This will pass
You call it running, I call it escaping
Accepting the worse in a situation and continuing to do it is to me a very difficult and mentally challenging. I’ve been working outdoors for weeks at a time; sunrise to sunset. My work is mentally taxing and physically demanding -it can really suck at times. I question the purpose of my labor and if it even matters at all. It’s not uncommon to feel like you’re not capable of enduring a whole week of work. So yeah, it fucking blows at times
But, I’m not going to quit. I know what I signed up for. I know I can do it. I know I want the challenge. I know I wouldn’t be happier if I never left.
I listened to an episode on a podcast called “An Audio Guide to Happiness” (ep. 1 Benefits of Gratitude) that has made me reflect on what I am grateful to have. When you recognize and value the things you already have you can imagine how worse your situation could be without them. Commodities, personal strengths, relationships and health are things that I think about.
On the worst days, I am grateful for my music. I tell my friends and other people that my most valuable possession is my Spotify music library. My love for music is the reason I made this blog too haha.
So shit, I don’t know…things get tough but think about what you do have and focus on that and not the bullshit. If you can.
I’ve also been thinking about why people leave their homes or go out and face new territories without having someone there or family there. I am one of those people that want to explore and challenge myself to new territories. I understand now that not everybody is out to seek adventure and all the hardships a big move can throw at you. Sitting, Waiting, Wishing isn’t on my schedule these days.
I decided to practice photographing portraits more often. In my opinion, portrait photography is very difficult, probably the hardest type of photography. In my lifetime, I’ve been around known people who don’t like to be in front of the lens at all or some that get self-conscious after a few snaps. I happen to be one of those people too! Directing a model is also hard to do. There really is a relationship built between the photographer and the model. Such a relationship can be created easily if you know the model and you can bring the best out of them. At times it can be super awkward if one of the partners is not feeling confidant.
Anyway, I have been wanting to do something like this for a while now. I want to introduce a friend or any person that is in my life somehow and ask them what song they enjoy at that moment. I want to give a little insight into why they like it and what I think about it too.
This is my brother, Juan Diego. He moved to Oakland about two months ago. Since then, he’s been cycling, skating, and gooning through the streets of San Francisco and the surrounding bay area. Juan D chose the track, “(Sittin’ On) the Dock of the Bay” by Otis Redding. During a visit to the bay, JD would play this song for me. He pointed out to me that the song talks about moving out west to the Bay. I figured that he liked to have that connection to the song. Later JD and I looked up the lyrics on Genius.com and found out that Redding and his band died in an airplane crash right before the song was released in 1968. The song won two Grammys and became one of the band’s most successful songs. JD explained his love for the song by saying
It’s a folksy song that strikes at something timeless – human dissatisfaction and our hope to always find something that will make us feel better and satisfied.
Juan Diego
JD and some other friends of mine went to all over San Fran and Berkeley that day. I used my 50mm on my brother’s shot. I lightly edited his photograph to cool it down a little and add more contrast. On the other shot, I also used my 50mm although I wished I would of used my telephoto lens. I ended up cropping the original shot to try to focus more on my brother. I enjoyed the leading lines created by the paved road and the large number of rectangles found in the frame.
Long post. But thanks for looking and reading.
El canto de mis fotos 